Saturday, August 27, 2005
First five weeks of school done.
I forgot to post this five weeks after it happened.... I get busy and forget to do things like exercise on a regular basis!
I finished my first week. It was exciting and hellish. I drove so much this week. I'm surprised I didn't crash. It was exciting because I get to teach two classes. Beginning Tennis... God I love teaching tennis. The thrill of watching people get excited because they can hit the ball back and forth.
I hope school goes well for me here at Fullerton. School is going okay. I'm trying to find my place in the master's program and in life. I found a job at Whittier Narrows Tennis Center in South El Monte, CA. Come check it out! I'm the short one girl among all the men!
I must jet and go shopping today for Adidas clothes. I love the stripes.
I finished my first week. It was exciting and hellish. I drove so much this week. I'm surprised I didn't crash. It was exciting because I get to teach two classes. Beginning Tennis... God I love teaching tennis. The thrill of watching people get excited because they can hit the ball back and forth.
I hope school goes well for me here at Fullerton. School is going okay. I'm trying to find my place in the master's program and in life. I found a job at Whittier Narrows Tennis Center in South El Monte, CA. Come check it out! I'm the short one girl among all the men!
I must jet and go shopping today for Adidas clothes. I love the stripes.
Tuesday, August 23, 2005
All moody and no where to go
Damn, I am so moody today. I don't know what is going on with me. I am worried about so many things. School, relationships, mr. cali meeting my dad. Driving an hour just to go to school. Not having our own apartment yet. Am I complaining? WELL I AM A COMPLAINER!!!
I need to stop, perhaps like those nicotine users. One patch at a time. Maybe each time I complain, I should run a mile. Hmmm... get in shape and keep my mouth from running off. I should start at CSUF. The problem is that I would run all day. I wish I could just enjoy the ride and not worry about my future, my potential jobs, my life. I'm a worrywart. So sad... isn't it?
Today was my first day of classes. The class is statistics for Kinesiology and it is going to kick my ass. I had such a hard time with it at Drexel. But I promise to learn everything and get an A in that class. If it means no sleeping, well then I will sleep. I can't sacrifice sleep. :)
I need to shower. ciao
I need to stop, perhaps like those nicotine users. One patch at a time. Maybe each time I complain, I should run a mile. Hmmm... get in shape and keep my mouth from running off. I should start at CSUF. The problem is that I would run all day. I wish I could just enjoy the ride and not worry about my future, my potential jobs, my life. I'm a worrywart. So sad... isn't it?
Today was my first day of classes. The class is statistics for Kinesiology and it is going to kick my ass. I had such a hard time with it at Drexel. But I promise to learn everything and get an A in that class. If it means no sleeping, well then I will sleep. I can't sacrifice sleep. :)
I need to shower. ciao
Sunday, August 21, 2005
First day of school tomorrow
Tomorrow is the first day of school at Cal State Fullerton. I can't believe I am going back to school finally. This summer has been the weirdest, slowest, and most frustrating. I moved to California this summer for the first time. I miss the East Coast so much. I miss walking to get coffee, lunch, and dinner. I miss watching all the cute babies with 50 year old parents. I miss looking at all the trendy people and wishing I could be so irresponsible and blow my rent on a pair of shoes. I mostly miss the sandwiches. I love sandwiches and here they are horrible. Even Subway sucks.
Anyway, back to school stuff. I am officially a Teacher Associate at Fullerton. I have to create a syllabus and give grades. How crazy is that. Me... I remember being such a horrible student. I wouldn't fail but I never talked to my professor. Thus, I never got any good recommendations.
I have failed a lot in school but I've done good things too, and now it's my turn to teach and hopefully work well with the students.
My classes are on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. Finally! I can't wait to graduate and get on with my life. My goals are to finish grad school, find a position at a community college in southern California, and move to Santa Monica.
Santa Monica is so beautiful. I absolutely loved it. Enough said.
Anyway, back to school stuff. I am officially a Teacher Associate at Fullerton. I have to create a syllabus and give grades. How crazy is that. Me... I remember being such a horrible student. I wouldn't fail but I never talked to my professor. Thus, I never got any good recommendations.
I have failed a lot in school but I've done good things too, and now it's my turn to teach and hopefully work well with the students.
My classes are on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. Finally! I can't wait to graduate and get on with my life. My goals are to finish grad school, find a position at a community college in southern California, and move to Santa Monica.
Santa Monica is so beautiful. I absolutely loved it. Enough said.
Friday, August 12, 2005
Why are we fighting?
My boyfriend of almost a year and I have been fighting since we moved to California. I'm not sure what is going on?
Is it me, unsure of my future with him and my career. Is it him getting sick of having to take care of me because I am unfamiliar with the area?
Today, we had a fight on the tennis court, as usual. We are both hot heads, but I am worse. We tend to blow up at each other. I believe you should never blame someone before you blame yourself. I feel he doesn't do that. He is quick to say it was my fault when it was OUR fault.
He later told me, during the fight, that no one likes me at the courts, that I have a horrible attitude, and he is not going to Mexico with me in September. He also said if we didn't live together, he would leave me alone for a couple of days.
Where does this attitude come from. All of a sudden he wants to do things without me and before we did everything together. At least in Philadelphia.
God, I miss my old life. I'm scared I screwed my life sometimes especially living here in California. I wonder if this is the right decision. I hope it is. I think about my decisions everyday. Why wasn't I accepted at my Temple job? Why did I do a lousy job? Why did the Head Coach not respect me? If she didn't like me, why did she hire me? Will I ever coach again? Will I finish my degree in California? Will I become a success?
That is my best question: Will I become a success?
That's what I really want and that means having a decent job that I look forward to and a loving family. My family, I hope, will include Mr. California (my boyfriend).
Is it me, unsure of my future with him and my career. Is it him getting sick of having to take care of me because I am unfamiliar with the area?
Today, we had a fight on the tennis court, as usual. We are both hot heads, but I am worse. We tend to blow up at each other. I believe you should never blame someone before you blame yourself. I feel he doesn't do that. He is quick to say it was my fault when it was OUR fault.
He later told me, during the fight, that no one likes me at the courts, that I have a horrible attitude, and he is not going to Mexico with me in September. He also said if we didn't live together, he would leave me alone for a couple of days.
Where does this attitude come from. All of a sudden he wants to do things without me and before we did everything together. At least in Philadelphia.
God, I miss my old life. I'm scared I screwed my life sometimes especially living here in California. I wonder if this is the right decision. I hope it is. I think about my decisions everyday. Why wasn't I accepted at my Temple job? Why did I do a lousy job? Why did the Head Coach not respect me? If she didn't like me, why did she hire me? Will I ever coach again? Will I finish my degree in California? Will I become a success?
That is my best question: Will I become a success?
That's what I really want and that means having a decent job that I look forward to and a loving family. My family, I hope, will include Mr. California (my boyfriend).
